Sea Dogs Part II

In order to understand the story of the Giant Dutchman (real name, Bernhard), you need some base knowledge of Dutch holiday culture. The Dutch have a Santa Claus. His name is Sinter Klaus. He is not fat and does not live at the North Pole. He is skinny and lives in Spain. The Dutch Santa is obviously way more intelligent than our Santa. Every November, Sinter Klaus makes his trek from warm, beautiful Spain to freezing cold, rainy Holland…by boat. He arrives in Amsterdam around the second week of November and parades through the town on a white horse with his Black Peters.

Black Peters were slaves from Turkey who helped Sinter Klaus travel throughout Holland until December 5th when he doled out either punishment (a kick to the butt) or reward (candy in your shoes and presents). Today Black Peters are white Dutchmen dressed in black face. Sinter Klaus no longer doles out kicks, he just acts like he is going to kick you but stops short of committing a battery.

The whole story seems strange to American ears but, as you can imagine, our story is equally strange to the freaky Dutch. Both traditions pale in strangeness to that of the Frisian Islanders. The Frisian Islands was an independent state until about 200 years ago (this according to Giant Dutchman, in fact, everything that follows is according to Giant Dutchman). They have a distinct language and unique customs.

Frisian Sinter Klaus day is actually a two day affair. The first day is a party where the kids get presents and the whole town drinks and dances. The second day is a bit more involved. All twelve of the town’s men get dressed in black robes with black gloves and shoes and black masks that allow you to see only their eyes. Women are not allowed to leave the house. All boys who are on the cusp of manhood, seventeenish years old, are brought into a dark room with the town’s men. The men are in a line, kind of like a receiving line at a funeral. The boys must shake the hand of each man. Just before the handshake, each man blows an African horn in the boy’s face. If any man senses fear in the boys’ grip he will remain a boy and must wait until the following Sinter Klaus celebration before he gets another stab at manhood, thus delaying his right to shoot a gun, take a bride, etc.

The reason for the African horn is not clear because Giant Dutchman spoke with a heavy accent and I was sitting three seats away from him. Regardless, the whole story left me speechless. He delivered it matter-of-factly and with a sense of pride. The Frisians are not going to raise no sissy boys. If you want to survive on an island in the middle of the North Sea, you have to have some cajones.